So the message of this song is definitely worthy of a story or two. Maybe I’ll do that part tomorrow. 
For tonight, just have a listen. I love it.
A Song For Your Thursday
August 30, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
Little Blessings (Pt. 47)
August 27, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
A run after being out for two weeks. It felt good. Really.
Taking the time to really clean the house (well, part of it ;)) and finding a pair of sandals for Maelie I’d forgotten we had. They’re on the big side now…hoping they’ll make it to next summer. We’ll see!
Free books. Since I write anyway, I figured I might as well read books (for free) and review them. First review coming soon!
Dark chocolate.
Watching my daughter learn to pray. Sometimes she prays for bizarre things…but I love watching her faith grow.
Sunshine and the fact that we still technically have over three weeks of “summer” left.
Jewelry making. Kind of on an earring kick these days…anyone need any? I make them…but I don’t really wear them. (I know I’m weird.)
Friend time with some Starbucks thrown in there, too.
Reading a really good post today that I’ll probably write about tomorrow.
Having a Father who can heal broken.
Fill-in-the-Blank Friday
August 24, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
I found this link-up awhile ago.
Love the idea.
So, tonight, I’m linkin’ up!
My favorite thing to do on Friday is hang out at church. I know that sounds a little weird, but every Friday morning, Maelie and I go to Immanuel to help with wrapping bread and delivering it to places in our area. We also get to see some pretty great people/friends then, too. A little blessing that’s an important part of our Friday and of our week. Oh, and I also like looking forward to the weekend. Who doesn’t?! 😉
This Friday I did the above. Plus a no-nap afternoon from the princess, coffee with a friend/playtime for our girls, and then dinner with them plus the hubbies. A good Friday. Defintely.
The best thing about a weekend is having all-of-us-together time. Even though life isn’t always easy with a two year-old and we’re very-imperfect human beings, I love that we can do little things together like play outside, go for walks, have ice cream dates. I also really look forward to church.
Now that summer is almost over I’m feeling the strange paradox of sadness and anticipation. I love the free and wonderful of summer that bring with it flip flops and swimming and sunshine and extra friend time. At the same time, I love fall. Early morning running, coffee on the back porch, sweater and jeans weather. Perfection.
The best thing I did this summer was ummm…??? I don’t think I can choose just one thing. I love friend and coffee time in general, and there were some oh-so-good times that included just those. Probably the highlight was the trip that Maelie and I made to the farm with our dear friend. We loved it. And she is still talking about it.
The thing I’m looking forward to about fall is leaf-crunching while I run. I…ahem…will actually go out of my way during a timed run if I see leaves that need to be crunched. And, of course, the sweaters and jeans…and the combat boots, too. 😉
If I had to be stuck in one season for the rest of my life, I would choose spring. (Funny that I did this for several years already. And let me tell you all…year-round summer is not all it’s cracked up to be.) I’d choose spring for the fact that it can kind of be anything on any given day. There’s a chance of snow but also a chance of a really beautiful, sunshine-y day. I also love the new life that emerges…such a beautiful picture of how our Father is continually teaching us to grow.
Thursday Thoughts
August 23, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
Hmmmm…that’s such nifty alliteration.
Ahem.
Actually, no. I didn’t even think about it ’til it was already written. That could potentially make me even more cool.
It was my first normal Thursday…”normal” as in Bible study, lunch with friends, playtime for Mae, minus the guitar lesson today…but, still. It’s nice to be back to the only form of routine we know.
I still really love Thursdays.
I’m not throwing coffee into the mix tonight, though. I’ve been extra tired since last week and figured I don’t need to add anything that may potentially keep me up. Right now, Sleep. Is. Good.
Today was a day of unexpected blessings. Seeing a dear friend at Bible study…and being able to connect with her a bit. I’d missed her. A get-together tonight with some friends, which I decided to attend almost-last-minute. It ended up being really, really good…nice to chat with people I don’t always see. Some time to catch up with a dear friend…she always makes me smile.
There was also time to process this afternoon. I really use that word too much…no worries, I’m completely aware of it!
I’m getting restless, and I know it. I love my daughter so much. The days we spend together are wonderful, even the tough ones, and I wouldn’t trade being home with her for anything.
But I need an outlet.
I was hoping it would be my book. You know, that thing I’d planned to have finished several months ago? Yeah, that one.
Unfortunately, I can’t always just pull words out of nowhere.
I can’t fix my laptop (the one that seems to have gone permanently ka-put) so I can actually write from the couch or in bed…I only get so much done sitting in a chair at a computer desk.
Maybe the one thing I can do is try to get a little boost of confidence from somewhere. A writer’s group, maybe? A friend passed on some info today about one. I think it’s time. I need to decide if I’m going somewhere with this or not.
It seems like everyone out there thinks they can write a book. I know that was a pretty general statement…it’s just that I so badly want it to be me. The one who actually finishes what she started and maybe even sells it.
It seems like such a far-off dream.
I’ve always been ok with being a dreamer, but I’m also realizing more and more that I need to decide.
I hate the unfinished.
For now, while I wait for the words to return, I’ll putter around here. Sometimes deep, sometimes not.
But always…always…I’ll be me.
This place is still my heart. And I hope you’ll still stop by.
Dependence
August 22, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
Sometimes I forget it’s where I should be, this place of dependence.
Because I get wrapped up in all that surrounds me.
I act as though the blessings around me aren’t fulfilling, aren’t a testimony of His mercy and grace in my life.
As if that free gift, the only thing I ever truly need, isn’t enough for me to feel complete.
Can I be honest with you, friends?
I hate the lies that I, all too often, allow Satan to feed me. What’s worse, I believe them.
When they start to overtake even a tiny corner of my mind, it’s all downhill.
His grip is powerful but not as powerful as my Father’s.
Life, lately, has seemed to be just this…allowing aspects of it to become overshadowed by untruth. Words hurt, lies creep in, and I let my heart get so wrapped up in those other things around me that it no longer belongs completely to my Father. My wholeness is found in the imperfect of this world rather than the perfect Love of Him.
Deep breath…
…because His mercies are new each and every day. He is my Rock. I won’t be shaken. He’ll lift me up and help me to stand. Give overwhelming, all-sufficient grace that is more than enough for each day.
Sometimes I think being dependent in this way is the best place to be.
Because when life is perfect, we somehow forget about the need.
But I? Most certainly need Him.
Father, keep me in the place where I never, ever forget that.
Blessings for Today
August 17, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
I read a really good reminder this morning in the book, Jesus Calling.
“Accept each day just as it comes to you. Do not waste your time and energy wishing for a different set of circumstances. Instead, trust Me enough to yield to My design and purposes. Remember that nothing can separate you from My loving Presence; you are Mine.
I love it.
I love, even more, how God knows exactly what I need each day…and how He always gives it.
It doesn’t always look the same.
Sometimes His measure of mercy, from an earthly perspective, looks far bigger for one day than it does for another. On days like Wednesday, when I was fighting pain and desperately needed healing, it was more tangible.
Today is different. Yes, there is pain, but it’s more manageable and isn’t the type that I spend time crying to God, begging for healing.
He knows my needs each day and gives according to what He knows I need…not according to what I think I need.
I love that about Him.
The rest of today, and for at least the weekend, I’m going to intentionally focus on those blessings…however He chooses to give them.
Today they came in simpler forms, but were no less than blessings…a friend offering to take Maelie for the morning. A nap. Tobin being able to work half a day in the office. A shower and the energy to do my hair and makeup. A visit from a friend. A facebook note from a friend. A chocolate banana smoothie from my hubby. Friends who are bringing us dinner tonight. A chance to slow down and reflect. A smiling girl who understands mommy’s “owie” and continually reminds me that Jesus will make it better.
Tell me that I’m not one of the most blessed people on the planet.
Wishing you all a wonderful weekend! Lotsa love to you, my friends.
There’s No Place Like The Purple Couch
August 16, 2012 by · 2 Comments
I’m back.
So I ended up taking a two day hiatus from the blog. And that’s ok. I need to give myself permission for things like that.
Especially when abdominal surgery is involved.
So the gall bladder came out on Tuesday.
The surgery itself was fine…I cried a little when they took me back to the OR and made me say goodbye to Tobin. But they gave me some type of sedative that had me floating within seconds, and before I knew it we were in the Operating Room. I vaguely remember them moving me to the operating table and strapping me down, and the next thing I remember is coming out of it all and doing something totally Mel.
Yeah, when the nurse asked me what I needed, I told her I wanted a hug.
Thank God for nurses who oblige strange requests, and even better, don’t make the patient feel like a complete idiot for asking in the first place.
She totally gave me a hug and then held my hand ’til I came to a little more.
At the time I thought it was completely normal to need a hug…now I roll my eyes at myself. However I suppose it IS better than spending the entire operation talking to my surgeon about something obscure. (Which, to my knowledge, did NOT happen. Another thank You, God.)
Tuesday afternoon was full of morphine and naps and a visit from my daughter and some sweet friends who were definitely good for my heart.
But since I was still in pain, the morphine continued to be administered.
By the next morning I still couldn’t eat anything or keep more than a tiny sip of water down, and I had a headache on top of all of that.
They figured it was the morphine making me sick, and I had to wait it all out for several hours before I could have anything more for pain. Or nausea. Or my headache. I’ll spare you the details, only to say that it was a miserable 4-5 hours.
I remember lying in that bed having a conversation with God. There was a lot of pleading with Him just take the pain away. I’m so thankful that in moments of weakness like that…especially when praising Him and giving thanks to Him were the furthest things from my mind…that He still hears prayer and answers it.
He sent a few things…a text from a friend, a phone call from my pastor, a quick chat with a nurse…to help take my mind off of the pain, too.
Once they were able to give me different pain meds and they kicked in, I perked up. I actually ate jello and crackers and even half of a turkey sandwich around 11 pm. (That is SO me…again.) I watched part of the Tonight Show and managed to get a decent night’s sleep, which I think is what really helped.
Today was ok…less pain, though it is still there and will be for a few days. I was blessed with some pretty great nurses who were there, for the most part, all three days I was in. It was nice to be on a first-name basis. Though when Tobin and Maelie came to get me around 1:30 this afternoon, I was definitely ready to go.
I went straight to our purple couch and have been (mostly) resting there since. A couple friends have stopped by, and those visits were definitely spirit-lifters. Life is good.
It’s always good to look back after a few not-so-easy days to see God in the smallest details. Gallbladder surgery was nothing earth-shattering, but it was still nice to have those reminders of His love and care.
Well, it’s getting somewhat late, and I can’t wait to crash for the night.
On the couch.
Oh, there’s no place (at least for now) like the purple couch.
Thanks for your prayers, friends.
Coffee?
August 13, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
Mmmm…caffeine at 10 p.m.
Why, yes, I am.
Honestly, I don’t know how long it will be before I have another cup of coffee. But, let’s be honest, in Mel’s world, even a day or two seems like eons. I’m just guessing that doctors who remove gallbladders don’t really suggest that their patients drink coffee after the procedure.
Man, that stinks.
Somehow…SOMEhow…I’ll survive, I guess.
😉
So, tomorrow’s the big day, and as much as I don’t want to think about it, it’s pretty much impossible to NOT. I’ll admit to you, though, that I’m fighting the strange paradox of being potentially mortified yet slightly entertained at the strong possibility of me talking in my sleep during surgery.
When I had foot surgery in ’00 I spent the entire time talking to the doctor about skiing. He told me he was quite entertained. But I? Was completely embarrassed. And sooooo very thankful I never had to see him again. Well, after the follow-up when I got two cortisone shots in my feet to pour a little more salt into the wound.
Oy…
Does anyone else have a fear of that? I wonder if there’s a name fear of talking in your sleep during surgery?
There should be.
Ok, now that I’ve let that lovely thought re-enter my mind, we’ll move on.
Though I’m not sure to what…
I realize that this has zero to do with me, really, but I think it is utterly ridiculous that kids are going back to school so stinkin’ early. August 13th? (I have friends down South whose kiddos went back LAST Monday. The 6th.)
REALLY?!?!?!
Summer is winding down…it’s always a tiny bit depressing. On the up side, I have another year with my girlie before she heads off to PK…she’s growing up so fast! I’m excited for our year together, though…there will be so much more we can do…trips to the library, parks, and maybe, just maybe, she’ll learn to sit through a coffee date as well!
One can always have a bit of hope.
She was such a cutie today. We had a pretty busy morning with a hair appointment, a Target run, late lunch, and then a nap. (Throw in there that I went to the hospital at 6 a.m. to get my pre-op bloodwork done.) When I woke her up from her nap this afternoon, she recounted the entire day for me, telling me all kinds of details. We had the following conversation:
Me: What did we do today, Mae?
Maelie: Mommy…haircut. I love haircut. Mae-Mae needs a haircut.
Me: Maybe…not yet. And then what did we do?
Maelie: Shopping! At Target!
Me: What did we buy?
Maelie: Um…goldfish. (No, just Cheez-Its, but she thinks all crackers are goldfish. :)) And baby doll!
Me: And then what did we do?
Maelie: I take a nap. Mommy sing. Cover up. (blanket) Larry Boy! (Veggie Tales music)
Seriously, I think she’s brilliant. She doesn’t forget a thing…which, ahem…is not always good. But a good reminder for me that she is always, always watching. Learning. Repeating.
I feel like I blinked and my baby girl grew up.
I know that in sixteen years, I’ll be saying that again. And probably a lot more times in between, too.
I love her…the goofy, jumping-up-and-down-in-her-crib, spirited, fun-loving, a bit crazy but oh-so sweet girl that she is.
I’m so blessed.
And on another random note, I heard this song on KLove today. I loved hearing it on the radio though I found the music video slightly cheesy. However, I have never in my life seen someone look so incredibly UH-dorable while singing and playing the guitar. In clunky shoes. Maybe that’ll be me one day. Hey, I can dream.
Have a listen!
Hopefully I’ll be on the blog for at least a little while tomorrow, but we’ll see how things go. Thanks for your prayers, friends!
Little Blessings (Pt. 46)
August 12, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
A super-successful, first-of-many, 5k event yesterday. YAY!
Snuggling with my girl while we sing songs together.
Friend chats with chocolate.
Music that lifts my soul and honors my Father.
Friends who will go out of their way to help me.
Double Stuf Oreo Cakesters. (Yeah, DON’T read the nutrition facts. Really. They won’t be a blessing anymore if you do!)
A hubby who will go grocery shopping so I don’t have to. He’s a keeper.
Words that are slowly returning. (I think.) 😉
Having a God Who is not limited. Ever.
Prayer and how powerful it is…thanks to each of you who have prayed for me. God is Good.
Rest
August 11, 2012 by · Leave a Comment
The other night Tobin commented on how quiet Maelie was when I put her to bed that night.
I told him it was usually that way. Because before I put her into her crib, we always take about ten minutes to rock, cuddle, and sing. It’s a special time of day for me with my girl, and even if she starts out those minutes wiggly and hyper and ready to run circles, she always calms down and snuggles close within a few minutes.
I’ve continued to think about that since our conversation… it really is a beautiful picture of our Father.
Sometimes life is just like that pre-cuddle-with-Maelie time…it’s full of those crazy, so-anxious-we-want-to-run-laps, emotions that threaten to swallow us completely. Feeling that it’s impossible to sit still and just Rest.
As I processed through some things this past week, there was one thing that really calmed this heart.
Taking that time to sit, be still, and spend time with my Father. Sometimes I wish He could give me a real hug, but the promises in His Word are just as good.
I’ve got a couple days coming up that are going to have moments of anxiety.
Instead of letting those feelings overtake me, I’m choosing to find rest in my Father.
He is so, so, Good.
