My God-Sized Dream: Deep Breath…

What do you really want more of in your life? Will you dare to say it out loud?

Well, since you’re asking…I really want more coffee and sleep. (Strange paradox, I know.) :) And, silly, but I’ve kinda been hoping for a pair of these…I can’t believe this world traveler has stomped her feet in so many places without a pair of TOMS. πŸ˜‰Β 

But since those probably aren’t acceptable (or inspiring) answers, we can talk a little longer.

:)

This was another question I wrestled with over the last week, but I think that wrestling and battling was so much against my own fear…and IΒ think what’s coming out of it is good.

Scary, but good.

Though, up front you need to know that this. is. the. scariest. post. I’ve. ever. written.

Please be gentle with my heart.

Deep breath…here we go.

*******************

In the fall semester of 2007, over our Idul Fitri break from school, some friends and I flew up to Sumatra to visit Bukit Lawang, an orangutan preserve. Included in that long weekend was a day-long jungle hike.

Forgive me here for not sharing too many fun details. This may, or may not, be a chapter in my book. :)

At some point during that hike, we stopped for a water break, and I took the time to really look around me.

Vines everywhere…it was totally like the movie Tarzan. And I’d kinda had this dream to be Jane at one point in my life. :)

It was at that moment I realized there was an opportunity in front of me…one that, if I didn’t take then, I might never have again.

So I asked our guide to cut me a vine so I could swing.

He looked at me, laughed a little, and then obliged. He was even kind enough to test it out for me.

I was scared for a minute, but I reminded myself that now was the time…and if I ever wanted to be jungle-swinging Jane, this was the day.

Deep breath…whoooooosh. I sailed through the jungle.

Ok, ok…so maybe sailed is the wrong word. :) Gotta be honest that my awesome vine-swing was not exactly like it is in the movies.

Definitely still a dream come true, but it wasn’t quite so dramatic. :)

My point?

Is that sometimes dreams take a deep breath and bravery, but they can turn into something truly incredible.

IMG_1283

*******************

I’ve been reading (and re-reading parts of) a fantastic book that I think maybe some of you have heard me talk about. πŸ˜‰

It’s pretty much amazing.

And as I’ve been chewing on the first part of the book (no, not literally…though I may have chewed off a few fingernails!) I’ve realized something.

When it comes to dreams and saying them aloud, I’ve been safe.

Really.

Maybe it’s because I am an ENFP through and through…very much a talker, processor, people-lover, sky-high dreamer, and I thrive on it all.

So when I shared my dream for the first time, it didn’t scare me, at least too much.

The prospect of writing a book, in general, doesn’t scare me because I’m not afraid of words and stories.

Don’t get me wrong, there will definitely be butterflies that will most likely be doing backflips off of my stomach lining when (and if) my book is published, but this kind of dreaming makes me want to jump up and down and do cartwheels.

At least right now. :)

All that to say, for me, there is safety with words.

God has given me this dream, and I know it’s for me…and because He gives good things to His children, I know He’s got this. And I can’t wait for His plan to unfold.

However…ya had to know there would be more, right?!

What do I want to see more of in my life?

Deep Breaths.

Bravery.

Leaping out of my comfort zone with my arms outstretched, ready to embrace whatever He has for me.

Last week a Dream Team sister and I were exchanging facebook messages, and I let something slip. Sort of…I really did want her to know. :)

My other dream.

There is another one…that long-term one that really seems out of reach right now.

For a long time I wanted to keep it hidden, preferrably behind a door with twelve locks, but that’s not being brave, now, is it? πŸ˜‰Β 

I want more bravery…more courage…to let go, and trust completely that my Father has all of these dreams in His hands and that He’s going to make them beautiful.

And not only the bravery to dream them but the heart to accept His answer, whatever it is.

So we’ve come to the part of the show…ahem, post…where I take a deep breath.

Deep breath…

Deep breath…

Deep breath…

and tell you another deep desire that has been rooted in my heart for quite some time.

There’s a pretty fantastic online space out there…maybe you’ve heard of it? πŸ˜‰

I’d love to be one of their regular writers.

Big exhale.

Father, you are the Giver of all dreams…and I trust You with this one, too.

Amen. Amen. Amen.

Friends, we are linking up! Every Tuesday at amazing, Holley Gerth’s place. Click on the button below and join us!

God-Sized Dreams

Sig

The Art of Real

I love those days.

The kind when I’m up front singing with praise team and a blog post idea comes to me, mid-song.

Really. I even somewhat processed it out as I sang, but really that’s not a good idea for more than one reason. πŸ˜‰

It was one of those days that actually started Saturday.

Wake up with monster headache.

Take ibuprofen, drink coffee, take time getting ready.

Go out to get a few things done.

Come home and get ready for commitment that night.

Monster headache still there…more ibuprofen.

Go to said commitment. Come home around 10:30, don’t get to sleep until 12:30. (with the time change thrown in there)

Sleep for six, too-short, hours.

Wake up, and lo and behold, headache? Yep, we’re good buddies now…apparently inseparable ones at that.

Get ready for church, get girlie ready for church, all of us leave at 9:20. (But, really, it’s 8:20. You know, with that awful time change.)

Look in the mirror when I get to church. Not good. I chose yesterday to wear those pants…you know, those. The ones that are a strange, shiny, shade of blue-almost-black that go with everything and, really, go with absolutely nothing.

Hair a mess…yay for day #2 and the new jar of hair putty I was experimenting with that gives me bedhead all day long. Still contemplating whether the slightly spiky, messy look is really a good thing or not.

Tired eyes…teenage skin. (Yep, it was one of those weeks.)

Belly pooching over pants…six pounds since Christmas, and my sixes don’t fit so well anymore.

I kind of wanted to crawl into the back pew and away from the world. But, noooo…not an option yesterday morning.

And as the morning continued on and I stood in up front of the congregation, the question I asked over and over…

Why am I so afraid of real?

Why does it bother me so much if my hair is less than perfect, and if my clothes aren’t equally perfect? If someone sees me without makeup? Or catches me at the end of a week that’s been full of editing and short nights from the girl and even less sleep for the mama?

Without realizing it, I’ve made it too easy to hide behind the makeup and as-perfect-as-I-can-manage hair, behind an outfit that helps me hide at least some of those extra pounds.

We have this image of perfect…and often forget that He loves imperfect. Anyway and in spite of.

But I still try to cover those imperfections…the ones He sees and knows and, yet, unconditionally loves.

I don’t have a pretty ending for this post. I just know what my heart looks like.

I also know that tomorrow morning, I’ll wake up, throw in some type of workout, shower, putty up my hair, put on some makeup, and wear clothes that (mostly) hide the hopefully-now-only five extra pounds.

But I’ll try…to be a little more content and see something beautiful when I see my reflection…instead of seeing all the flaws.

Because He loves flawed and imperfect.

He loves real.

And, this is cool…I wrote most of this post before I read what one of my favorite bloggers, Lisa-Jo, wrote today. I love her perspective…hop over and read her heart. It’s beautiful.

Sig

Five-Minute Friday: Home

Today I’m linking up with Lisa-Jo at The Gypsy Mama for Five-Minute Friday.

Join me!

The rules: Write for five minutes. No editing, revising, overthinking, or backtracking. Just write.

Today’s Topic: Home

Home.

The word has taken on such a different meaning for me in the past, almost-three, years.

I used to think it was a place…this two-story, blue beauty on the corner of Wisconsin and Charles, nestled into what I think is possibly the best neighborhood in the world.

Surrounded by neighbors who have become friends and friends who have become family, this place is our home.

front_lowres
I smile every time I remember the moment…the time we walked through the door for the first time. We just looked at each other, and we knew. This was it.

Home.

And we have been blessed to plant our roots deep and give our daughter a place to call home…and give ourselves that place, too.

But as I look at our lives…though young, we’ve seen a lot. We’ve experienced the temporary of home and the unknown of the journey…and though it’s always nice to have a place, it isn’t a building that makes a home.

It’s people and love…those that surround us each day and love us despite the ugly and imperfect, those who choose to be part of our lives and hearts.

They are what makes a home.

Oh, I love my blue house, number 127.

But my home is just that because of the love I’ve been blessed with.

Almost by accident last fall, I stumbled onto a quote, one now painted (well, it was a rub-on if we’re being technical ;)) on our living room wall.

Life takes you to unexpected places; Love brings you home.

Always. And we are home. It’s good.

Five Minute Friday

Sig

Thursday Night and No Place to Go…

Well, now that it’s almost 10 p.m. There were plenty of places to be today. :)

It’s been a long time since we’ve just had a virtual chat.

So, while I finish my dinner (yep, it was a praise-team-practice, eat-dinner-late night) we can talk about food and life and potty training and the snow…just maybe not all at once. πŸ˜‰

So, first up. Dinner. (‘Cause I like to eat…don’t we all?!) I have proved my theory that you can take the girl out of Asia, but you can’t take the Asia out of the girl. My choice for dinner was leftover pizza or leftover sweet and sour chicken. I totally went for the chicken…and not because of the chicken.

It was the rice.

Totally the rice.

I love rice.

We ate it at least five times a week in Indonesia, and I’m actually quite amazed I don’t detest the stuff. In fact, I still crave it. Weird, I know. (But true fact…we only eat it about once a month.)

And moving on to my girl…oh, how I love her.

But I’d be not completely telling you the truth if I said I loved potty training her. It’s just not going as great as I thought it would be by now. I’m really trying to celebrate every success, and truthfully, she’s closer than she was a month ago. I will take even a millimeter of progress at this moment.

But I’ll also take some prayers should you feel led to say them for us. πŸ˜‰

I’m am thankful, though, that despite the potty training drama in the house, we have a thousand other reasons to smile through our days. :)

I just can’t believe how much she’s growing up and changing and turning into such the wonderful little person. I adore her. :)

Her imagination and vocabulary are just exploding. Yesterday I was working on something in the kitchen and overheard her having her princesses act out a scene from one of her favorite movies. She even had the words right…she amazes me.

She’s a puzzle maniac. The girl puts 24 piece puzzles together already…in fact, she stunned me the other day when she took a brand new one out of the box and snapped it together without even looking at the picture. Gotta be honest here…I’m not sure I could have done it that fast.

And snow with a toddler? Has been way too much fun…this coming from a girl who doesn’t exactly love winter. (Though I don’t hate it…I would just rather be warm. :)) On Tuesday, we got a lot of snow, and she came outside with me while I shoveled the driveway. She was fascinated with the piles of snow on either side and created her own “slide”…I wish I had a taken a picture. Too cute. :)

Last week we also built our first snowman with Tobin, and a few days later, Mae and I went out and turned our snowman into a tropical snowprincess…complete with an Indonesian sarong…thanks to some inspiration from our dear friend. :)

Tell me this isn’t completely adorable?

We had fun…and I love the memories we’re making.

Sometimes I struggle with being the stay-at-home-mom who’s home a lot…I don’t have a lot of things vying for my attention that are outside the house. And while I stay busy with my girl and writing, sometimes it’s a little too easy to feel like I’m not making a difference.

And then I remind myself that she’s going to Preschool in five months. Well, pending potty training success.

Somebody pinch me because it doesn’t seem possible.

The truth is that I’m so blessed to be home with her during these years, and though there are difficult days, I truly love my job and wouldn’t change a thing. And I need to soak up every second.

And because it’s getting late and my Diet Coke is almost gone and I’m also a little sniff-sniff because my girlie is growing up too fast, maybe I should say good night for now.

:)

Thanks for stopping by, friends. And Happy Almost-Friday!

Sig

My God-Sized Dream: A Letter to My Dreaming Sisters

To my dear, sweet, beautiful, inspiring, God-Sized dreaming sisters,

Do you know how much you have added to my life in the last few months?

When I saw the topic for this week, I almost didn’t feel like I was in the place to do the encouraging because you, my friends, have been that encouragement for me in the past months.

And it has been a true joy to know you and love you and cheer for YOU as you go for your dreams, too! So, thank you.

I’m a mushy-gush when it comes to friends…just putting that out there now. :) I value relationships and am so blessed by each of you. I just love you all and the way you inspire me through your stories, through the way you courageously dream SO BIG, through the way you live your lives in obedience and surrender, even when it’s hard...and it usually is.

Keeping up with a b-gillion new friends can be a challenge. (Amen, yeah?) πŸ˜‰ But I try to read as many of your stories as I can. And you know what?

Every. Single. One. Is worth sharing.

Your dreams matter, your voice is important. We need you, and you have purpose.

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)

I love, love, LOVE how God brought together this group of dreamers…and how we’ve been able to love on each other and pour on encouragement and blessings, despite the fact that most of us have never met face-to-face.

Just heart-to-heart…and maybe that’s even better. (Though I definitely can’t wait to meet you!)

And as each of you go for your dreams and walk (or skip or full-on sprint…however it is that you travel) this journey, I want you to know…

You can do it! {You need to insert some hand holding from me, jumping up and down, and squealing. Because if we were meeting (in)RL, this is how I’d cheer for you. :)} I believe in you, I pray for you, and I am so excited to watch God work in each of your hearts and lives! If God places the dream in your heart, He’s going to give exactly what you need for it to happen.

AND

You are His! Even more important, you are loved by Him…bought with a price, (not a cheap one, either) valued, and honored in His sight. That’s an amazing Truth I think we, all too often, forget.

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!
1 John 3:1a (NIV)

There are going to be those days of discouragement, and when you have them, remember these Truths.

I am blessed beyond anything to walk this road with each of you, and you will now, and always, hold a place in my heart. Philippians 1:7.

Love,
Mel

P.S. I’ve been dying to share this video with you all. Though it’s definitely on the silly side, it always leaves me smiling and dreaming a little more! Feel free to crank up the volume and dance around…that’s what we do in our house! πŸ˜‰

We’re linkin’ up every Tuesday! Today, you are sure to be blessed by reading the letters that some amazing dreamers have written to each other. Click on the link below and hop over to say hi!

God-Sized Dreams

And don’t forget that Holley Gerth‘s new book, You’re Made for a God-Sized Dream: Opening the Door to All God Has for You is now available! You can find it at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Dayspring, or your local Christian bookstore. I hope you’ll take the time to check it out…Holley’s words and her heart will bless you!

Sig

Five-Minute Friday: Ordinary

Today I’m linking up with Lisa-Jo at The Gypsy Mama for Five-Minute Friday.

Join me!

The rules: Write for five minutes. No editing, revising, overthinking, or backtracking. Just write.

Today’s Topic: Ordinary

When I was younger, I wished for blond hair and blue eyes.

And other than those few months of scorching, Iowa summer each year, when the combination of sun and chlorine would turn my locks a sandy-gold color, this brunette always kept wishing.

Well, there was that time in college when I bleached my hair so white I ruined it and had to cut it all off… πŸ˜‰

But, back to the life of a brunette. One with brown eyes, too.

I spent so much of my childhood feeling like that plain, ordinary girl…the one who blended in with everyone else. The one who never stood out. (Well, for a good reason, at least.)

Much of life is the same, probably for most of us.

We stare at what we see reflected in the mirror and wish for something more…something to make us stand out, something to make us special, something to tell the world, I’m worth seeing.

Anything at all to release us from the stickiness that the label of ordinary brands those of us who let it define a piece of who we are.

And then He reminds me, as He always does…just when I’m getting to that point of discontentment and wishing.

You are Mine.

I love you, just as you are.

Enough that I bought you for a price.

None of those scream ordinary at all.

In fact, I‘m pretty sure they’re extraordinary.

I dye my hair every four weeks now. (Special thanks to my daddy-o for the awesome genes in making me gray in my mid-30’s. :))

My color of choice?

Deep, dark brown. :)

Five Minute Friday

Sig

My God-Sized Dream: With Love

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (NIV)

It’s been nearly 27 years since he first walked into my life, and many of those little details have faded far into the shadows of my eight year-old past.

It was one of the first days of third grade, and I sat in my seat in the second row, a quiet and shy girl with way-too-long, brown hair that I would often twist around my finger while I chewed on the end of my pencil, while learning of course. :) (Can we say easily distracted? ;))

There was a little knock on the classroom door, and a man walked in. I remember thinking he looked like a grandpa.

Through some quick introductions from our teacher, Mrs. D, we found out that “Grandpa Don” was her father-in-law and that he was going to help out in our class two days a week.

I don’t really remember the beginning of our time with him as much. He would come to our class and help out, he would play with us at recess, he would eat lunch with us.

But it wasn’t long before he became so popular that we had to start drawing names for who got to sit by him. I’ll never forget the day it was my turn. :)

For some reason, the two of us connected.

I can’t, to this day, explain why…other than the fact that God must have told Grandpa Don how much I needed him for a friend.

He would show up at my house on Saturdays, bring me chocolate ice cream, and then he’d set up the lawn darts in our front yard and show me how to play. (I was really bad.)

He would take me fishing and to Taco John’s.

Once he went to the store and bought me a new headband because I’d broken mine on the playground that morning. (Probably doing a headfirst flip from some piece of now-banned playground equipment. ;))

We would sit on the front porch of the cream and brown house on Park Street house and talk for a long time; sometimes my dad would join us, too.

He had stories, and I remember hanging on to every word.

The funny thing is that, almost three decades later, I don’t remember those stories.

I remember the love.

Third grade ended, and I missed seeing my friend. Once in awhile he would show up at the fourth grade building to help out, and he would still come by on Saturdays here and there, always with chocolate ice cream. That continued through fifth grade, too.

The middle school years passed, high school arrived, and I’d see him at his grandkids’ basketball games or here and there around town…and during my sophomore year, I heard that he was sick. Dying, sick.

He was gone a few months later, and I cried. A lot. (I still cry.)

And, almost nineteen years ago to the day he left us, I sit down to remember him in this space. (And keep the tissues close.)

You could take the time to ask anyone who spent a significant amount of time in my hometown, and they would remember him…for he left a mark. Not with grand achievements or through personal gain…but in the way he loved others.

Grandpa Don wasn’t a dreamer in the BIG sense, as so many of us might view dreamers.

He’d had a successful career, and upon retirement, decided to use his days to give back…to make a difference. To love.

There was a day, about a decade ago, when I was out at the cemetery and went to look for his stone. I knew the approximate area where it was located, and when I found it, a twinge of sadness set in.

A small plaque with his name, dates of birth and death staring up at me.

This man, one who had given of himself so much, was remembered with a simple plaque, nothing more. Everything in me wanted to scream, But he was so much more than that!

And he was.

It wasn’t about the rewards on earth for my beloved Grandpa Don…it was simply about love. About doing all things with that love.

And I will never, ever forget him or the way he inspired me to love.

*********************

Each day I walk this path that my Father has placed before me.

Sometimes I’m obedient and step exactly where He’s planned; other days, I take a little (or not-so-little) detour.

I’ve talked about my dream…to see my book in print, to share my stories, to tell you about what my Father did in my heart and life, despite the fact that my heart and life didn’t always reflect Him.

But, ultimately…if I could only ever choose one thing to strive for…it would be love.

The kind of love that leaves people better than they were…the kind of love Grandpa Don showed to so many. The kind that mirrors the love of my Father.

I wish I had a picture of my Grandpa Don…just a small way to remember my friend.

But I don’t…and now, I remember him in my heart. One that, I’m sure, is better because I was loved by him.

And I can best honor my friend, and my Father, by choosing that love in my life every single day as I strive for a dream God has planted deeply in my heart.

Father, please help me to do all things in the power of Your Love.

Holley asked us this week to think about someone whose journey toward a dream had inspired us and share their story. I thought about a lot of people, but being the heart-writer I am, I wanted to write about someone who’d had an important impact, personally, in my life. You can read more from my dreaming sisters by clicking on the link below. I hope you’ll join us!

God-Sized Dreams

Sig

Monday Talk

Hi friends…happy Monday!

The day of the week that I used to not love, but gotta be honest…it’s growing on me. But that could also be because coffee tends to make any day look a little better.

πŸ˜‰

I am incredibly blessed.

For so many reasons, but in the past few days, it has been almost overwhelming (but the good kind of that) to see how God is speaking Truth into my life.

Amazing concept that if I will be still and listen, I might actually hear! πŸ˜‰

It humbles and amazes me that He knows this heart…the one that can beat with a hundred different emotions at once, and He can still decipher those and know exactly what I need.

…hurt=peace

...confusion=assurance

…doubt=Truth

…loneliness=enough

emptiness=encouragement

Just a few of the ways He has met me since Thursday. You know, that day when I truly vowed to find bloggy-balance. (Hee hee…do you think they would coin that term and give me credit?!) πŸ˜‰

And for those of you who read that post, I thought you might be interested to know that God brought up that verse Saturday AND Sunday, in separate contexts from different people.

He speaks. Loudly…and it’s amazing what happens when we turn off the noise.Β 

So on Friday’s I participate in Lisa-Jo‘s Five-Minute Friday. It’s become sort of a tradition for me in ending my week, one that I truly love. It’s also given me the chance to connect with some beautiful, amazing friends out there who heart-write, just like I do. :)

Last week, as I mentioned in my post, her topic scared the begeebies out of me. I may or may not have mentioned wanting to run away from the computer?! πŸ˜‰

And then, this past Friday’s word did the same thing to me.

I wrestled with those topics on the days I wrote of them and the days following.

And then I realized that half of that was the fact that He’s stretching me…growing me. He tends to do that, I guess, when we grow tired of complacency and desire to, instead, be what He’s called us to be.

Thanks to my (mostly) non-TV Lent, too, I’ve been doing a lot more reading.

I’ve just started Angie Smith’s book, Mended: Pieces of a Life Made Whole. Angie speaks such truth in a way that anyone can relate to…and I am (intentionally) slowly soaking in each sentence. I have been somewhat guarded with the topic of this book, but within the first few sentences, I knew that God had brought a group of women (and the study they are doing on this particular book) into my life for a reason. Will you pray I will find the courage to connect with them this week? :)

My Bible study at church is also starting a new book. I’m looking forward to going through it in-real-life with some of the sweetest friends ever and praying that God will show me Truth…and with this particular topic, I’m expecting some of that Truth to be tough. I’m praying He’ll keep my heart open.

And I’ve been reading through Holley Gerth’s book, You’re Made for a God-Sized Dream: Opening the Door to All God Has for You.

Friends, just WOW…the good kind. So Holley has the gift of writing to begin with, but Truth and beauty just ooze from her grace-filled words. It’s a book that is hard to put down because I just can’t wait for what she’s going to say next, but once again, I am intentionally soaking in the words and praying God will use them in the journey to be more like His Son.

Oh, and guess what?!

Her book officially releases on Friday, and I’m giving away a copy. :)

So, a hint for y’all…stop back by here on Wednesday or Thursday to enter for a chance to win the book and some other fun stuff. Chocolate may or may not be included. And by may-or-may-not, I mean most definitely. Just in case you weren’t sure. πŸ˜‰

Hope you all had a fantastic Monday. :)

Sig

Five-Minute Friday: What Mama Did

Today I’m linking up with Lisa-Jo at The Gypsy Mama for Five-Minute Friday.

Join me!

The rules: Write for five minutes. No editing, revising, overthinking, or backtracking. Just write.

Today’s Topic: What Mama Did

It’s a day I have waited for…and dreaded at the same time.

That day when I cross the line, officially, from child to adult. No, not my eighteenth birthday, but I rang that in a few weeks ago.

I’m leaving for college.

It’s time to go…time to get out of here, or more like high speed it out of here on I-35 in my awesome ’85 Olds.

And I know I don’t do goodbye well…or see ya later…or even hello, but what the future holds for me is bright. I just know it.

And I leave behind the place that started me…and the people who were the pieces of that beginning, too.

She was one of my biggest influences, my mom…and life turned out much differently than any of us had ever planned. Circumstances were unfair, the consequences of decisions affected us to the core, and when I packed my bags on that sweltering August day, we knew that I was leaving as a much different person than I had been before they ended.

Her and my daddy.

And my last two years there, it was just me and her. She was strong and did what she had to do, but the situation changed us all forever.

And now I’m me…not the same as I was, but still pieces of it.

Sometimes stumbling, faltering…and I learn again to rest in His grace and remember that there is always a brand new day coming where His new mercies abound.

Almost seventeen years later, I think about the new journey that day began.

I kiss my husband.

I love on my daughter.

I thank God for the many, many blessings He has so graciously given.

Included in those blessings, are those pieces from my beginning. My daddy. My mama.

And now, I continue on in her shoes.

And I hope that, one day, when my daughter is asked to reflect, she will write of me with thankfulness and love for all we shared.

Five Minute Friday

Sig

More of the Still

It has been one of those seasons…over and over, there have been reminders from Him.

Sometimes quiet whispers, sometimes not-so-quiet, and a few in-my-face. πŸ˜‰

For some reason, God keeps bringing this verse into my life…literally. I can’t even count the number of times it’s come up on the radio, in sermons, in reading…in the past few weeks.

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”
Exodus 14:14 (NIV)

At first it was a little weird to me that this verse, one that spent most of my life hidden away in the sometimes-elusive Old Testament, has now become such a precious promise to me…but I’m so amazed at all that He’s teaching me through these twelve words.

So it’s probably not news to most of you that I’m an open person…and I’m well aware of the amount of heart-spill that happens on these pages. It may surprise you, though, that I do have a filter, though it’s not always in the proper place while I’m doing that heart-spill. πŸ˜‰

I have struggled with this for a long time…and, combined with my sheer love of words and talking and sharing, I’ve almost exhausted myself.

And probably shared too much.

So this verse is more than a promise to me from God…it’s also a challenge.

You see, friends, He is fighting for me. He’s fighting for all of us…and He’s fighting for the good.

Always the good.

He just asks that we be stilland that involves so much more than physical stillness, which I believe is an important part of choosing to sit and be, too.

It’s learning to have a quiet heart…one that can be silent enough that when He speaks…I can actually listen. I have to admit that I’m not so good at that. Some people are internal processors, and I am anything but…I always feel the need to talk and share and bounce my thoughts off of those closest to me.

Right now, He’s asking one thing of this heart…

To be still.

And what He’s asking of me means a lot of things.

Rest. (I need to stop my literal burning of the midnight oil. My new goal is in bed by 11, up at 6:30. Yes, seven-ish hours. Ambitious, I know…honestly I’ll be happy with seven good hours, but that extra 30 minutes would sure be nice.) πŸ˜‰

Quiet. I have got to learn the art of thought before words, of consideration before expressing. It’s not my strength, and I think I have gotten better, but there’s room for improvement. :)

Less Words. This place is going to be quieter for a few weeks. I have to admit to you that it just about kills me to only visit here a few times a week…as in three, maybe four. (No more.) Tuesdays, Fridays, and another day in there. And it’s not permanent…but for a season, I need to step back.

Not walk away…just distance myself a bit. For lots of reasons.

For one thing, my rough draft is getting so close…and while I don’t want to force the words out, it does feel as if it’s coming more easily, and I’m SO excited to see this dream continue to grow.

More importantly, my daughter is growing up WAY. TOO. FAST. She is at the most amazing age…and we are truly having the best days together. I want to soak up each and every one completely. :)

As I’ve gotten busier during the past two months, I’ve noticed a decrease in the time I spend encouraging others. I want to intentionally make time for coffee or a chat, for writing a note or having a text conversation, and even for prayer. Relationships are huge part of my life.

Which brings me to my hubby. Since beginning his new job, it feels like we see much less of each other…and I want to be able to give him quality time together…not time that is spent distracted by what I feel needs to be written.

I also want to really focus on filling at this point.

As a writer, I often feel like I spend so much time pouring…and it’s time to fill up.

I’m blessed. Through connections and some amazing women in my life, both in-real-life and online, I’m part of two different studies and have three incredible books to read, books that are speaking Truth to me in ways that are so needed and such blessings.

I love how He knows and meets me exactly where I need to be met…without me even asking.

So please be patient with me for the next few weeks, friends. There won’t be new thoughts every day…though I will still be here at least a few times a week…but I’m not going to push it. Just take the opportunity if it’s there and I can. :)

I want you to know that you truly bless me just by being here, reading my words, and allowing me to share part of my heart with you.

Please pray that during this time of stillness I will really learn to be still.

Thanks so much…love you all!

Sig