Five-Minute Friday: She

Today I’m linking up with Lisa-Jo for Five-Minute Friday.

Join me!

The rules: Write for five minutes. No editing, revising, overthinking, or backtracking. Just write.

Today’s prompt: She

So I have this rule…

I go with the first thing that pops into my head when I see the prompt for a Five-Minute Friday.

You would think, with a prompt like she that would be a no-brainer.

Beautiful, fun, crazy, spirited, wonderful daughter…yep. There’s endless material to write about there.

However…

That’s not the she I thought of. So we go with it…and I give myself grace.

And forgiveness…right now, I don’t want to write about her.

Because she…she was the meanest person I’ve ever known.

The words that came out of her mouth were awful. The way she kicked my knees during choir and stomped on my pride in front of everyone…it was all just mean. The way she’d intentionally find a way to hurt me…

Sometimes I can’t even think about it.

I often resented even being in the same room as she was…I wanted to escape. And, yet…it was high school. Ya know how they have those laws about kids going to school?

Well, they kind of have to. And so I went, but I made every effort to avoid her.

And I honestly haven’t missed her a day since the last time I saw her sometime in May of 1996.

For years, I was sure that my interactions with her had scarred me for life, had wounded my soul, had made me less of a person than I would have been otherwise.

But I was wrong.

In the strangest way, she made me a better person. I learned from her how not to treat others, how to think before I act, how to make things right if I hurt someone.

The list goes on.

And today…on a random Thursday night…I think about what I might say if I ever saw her again.

Probably, it’s ok. And it’s over.

Because part of me wonders what ever happened to her…and if she was ever sorry.

I hope so.

Five Minute Friday

Sig

Comments

  1. Isn’t it funny how those people can leave such an impression on us. Oh I had some mean girls to contend with and I always try to remember and praying I wasn’t that way to other people. hugs fmf friend!

    • Thank you, Casey…hugs back. :) I think there’s that part of all of use that’s had to deal with the mean girls. Like you said, I just hope I’m not like that. Ever. Have a great weekend, friend!

  2. I love that you write about the first thing that pops in your head. I usually do that too; but the first thing that popped in mine this week was a line from a song: “she’s a broken lady, waiting to be mended…” Couldn’t remember the rest of the song and had to move along.

    I am sorry to hear of your hurts in high school. You are not alone. I love your list of what you learned. Bless you!

  3. Oh, I remember this same “she” in my life too. And I learned at a young age what being “me” and only “me” without HIM in the mix would look like. Because I learned that “she” was a lot like me…

    • There’s such wisdom in what you shared…I think I forget sometimes that without Him, that’s exactly who I am. Maybe I should be praying more that she has found Jesus…in fact, I know I should. Blessings to you, Hannah! :)

  4. It’s amazing how years and years later those words and actions still hurt! And who knows if she remembers them? But yet we do, and we are deeply affected. Our words are so powerful and our actions birth reactions for years to come. I remember a girl that always teased me in school started being nice to me now that 10 years have passed and I kept thinking , “What has happened?” I guess insecurity breeds all sort of hostility and defense mechanisms in us.

    • Sometimes I think back to that time and wonder what was happening in her life to cause her to be that way. I have a feeling it had nothing to do with me and everything to do with her own insecurity…I’m almost sad for her. Thanks for stopping by, Somer, and for sharing your words…blessings and happy Friday to you! :)

  5. How we can be forever changed by challenges to our very being. I am thankful for the wisdom of our Father for knowing what’s best for us, to mold us into who He desires us to be. Oh, to not be a “she” to someone else!

    • Such a good reminder…even through the difficult days, He is wise enough to know what (or who!) is best for us. :) Blessings, friend…have a beautiful weekend!

  6. you never know the impact (positive or neg) that you will leave on someone. But yes sometimes those negative experiences are what change us for the better!

    • It’s a reminder to me to consider my words and actions…knowing that they DO impact others. Blessings, Jessica…hope you have a wonderful Friday! :)

  7. I’m so glad you were able to release this she if even for a moment through tonight’s prompt. I’m also glad you took her negative and made it a positive by becoming the opposite of what she was…thank you for sharing.

  8. Thank you for sharing about a not-so-nice she. We all have one of these in our lives. So thankful that the Lord can use negative people to show us how we should love like He loves. Thanks for sharing honestly!

  9. People show us how they treat themselves in the way they treat others.

  10. Forgiveness is amazing…but it is sad how terrible kids are to one another. And it hasn’t changed, maybe even gotten worse and it makes me sad for my kids growing up in an environment where this kind of behavior isn’t dealt with. I am glad that you have been able to let go of the hurt and see how you have grown. Hopefully she too has changed!!

    • Oh, agreed…I can’t let myself think too long about the things (or people) my girl might have to deal with. This mama stuff is tough…and it hurts when our kiddos hurt, too. Happy weekend to you, sweet friend…I hope it’s wonderful! :)

  11. The hardest of situations and the most painful things we deal with seems to be the ones He uses to give us grace and heal us. It hurts my heart to hear your pain, but it makes me smile to see the beauty in you He brought from it. You are beautiful and precious and I am so thankful for you!!

    • Oh, you are always so sweet and encouraging, friend…I smile every time I see you here! Thank you…and I hope you have a beautiful weekend. Sending hugs! :)

  12. Glad you went with your first thought! I, too, had my own “she” in my life. As I read your words, I thought of what Joseph told his brothers, what you meant for evil, God meant for good.

    • Oh, that’s a good reminder. I think I’ll go back and read that account sometime soon. Thank you for sharing, friend! Happy weekend to you! :)

  13. This just brought me back 38 years. Remembering that time in my life recently also, and all that it taught me too. Great words. Rosanne

  14. I love that you have that “first thing that comes into my mind” rule. I have been unconsciously holding myself to the same thing. And it is really interesting what that brings about. I’m so glad that you were able to take a negative experience and use it for good. Sometimes we don’t want anything to happen to us or to our kids, but as the wise Dory from Finding Nemo pointed out, that wouldn’t be much of a life would it (my own words)? Those hard things have the potential to mold us into more sensitive, caring people. It sounds like that’s the direction you allowed God to guide you in this. ~Blessings

    • Your words are such an encouragement to me…thank you, Nita! And I agree…though those times definitely aren’t fun, they are what play such an important part in helping us to grow to become more like Him. Blessings to you…and wishing you a wonderful weekend! :)

  15. People can cut each other to the core. It’s a sad and useless exertion of energy. I’m so sorry you had to endure that. But what a testament to Jesus you are making by letting it go. Mercy is letting go. You are wonderful, friend! Have a beautiful Friday!

    • Mercy IS letting go…I love how God keeps bringing that word back to me. :) His blessings to you, friend…I hope your week is beautiful, too!

  16. Dear Mel
    She sounds like a wounded little one who wanted to hide her insecurities and shame?
    No wonder you have such a soft, gentle, brilliant smile. You surely were redeemed by the One who saw it all from day one and loved you nonetheless.
    Blessings x
    Mia

    • I would agree with that…I’m sure she was wounded, and that makes me sad. I pray she’s found the peace that comes only from Him. Love to you, friend…blessings on your week! :)

  17. Oh I hope so too! Praying for her this morning… and for you! And yes – isn’t it those hard times – those eucharisteos – that stretch us into more of who He created us to be? Love this… great post!

  18. Wow. Your post immediately brought to my mind my own “she”. What a flashback. She would bump into me in the hallways… trying to get me to fight back. She would taunt me with words and make others laugh. She handed me my first brick to lay the foundation around my “I can handle this” wall. She never gave up. And I never gave in. I laughed. Yet inwardly I cried and asked the question… why? Why was I her target? Why in the world did she delight in bullying me?
    It was years ago I forgave her. And today I smile.
    She no longer brings me pain… but joy. She grew up. And she is a better person. :0)
    THANK YOU for such a wonderful post.
    Dawn

    • I’m sorry you had to go through that, friend…but smiling for you because forgiveness is truly freeing. Thank you for your sweet words…blessings and happy week to you! :)

  19. Hugs friend. Been there, still wonder if they are sorry. Love you! Hope you have a beautiful weekend.

  20. No matter how old we get the memories of those early hurts still sting a little from time to time. However, if we decide to face them as you did with your words here they can never overwhelm us again. I pray that one day somehow she to (if she has not already) finds the same peace to her past.

  21. It’s crazy how we can let someone have that much control over us…even years after any interaction between us has ended! I’m glad that you have come to a place where you can forgive and let go and move on. I’ve been able to do that with some people, but there are still one or two that it’s just so hard to get past. I’m sure I’m on someone’s list too as I’m certain to have been mean or insensitive or rude to others! Thankful for the grace God gives me and encourages me to extend to others!

    • Thank you, Holly. :) Your words reminded me of the importance of being kind to everyone…because I don’t want to be the person she was to me, to someone else. Definitely a good reminder. Blessings, friend…have a wonderful week! :)

  22. Mel, your writing is so free and for Him. Love love love!!

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