I Love My Girl

February 21, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

Ok, I’m gonna do some mommy bragging today. :) I really try not to do too much of that, but I do think I have the coolest girl in the world.

Anyway…

My sweet Mae had a rough week/weekend.

It actually started last Tuesday night/Wednesday with a cough. Things got worse, and by Thursday night she had a high(er) fever going.

Friday she seemed to be ok, but things got bad again at night, and her temp hovered around 102.2 or so.

We decided it was time to take her to the doctor so we headed there on Saturday morning.

He checked her out, said she had an ear infection and RSV, and told us to give it a couple more days but he would write a prescription for her “just in case”.

Just in case?

Ok.

Maybe I’m off here, but isn’t three days of a fever enough? Tylenol obviously wasn’t doing the trick.

We waited it out anyway, and I put her to bed around 8:00.

She woke up crying at 9:45 or so and I went to change her diaper and take her temperature.

103.6

My heart started to pound.

I didn’t even k now

what to do at that point, so I sent a text

to my friend.

We gave her some tylenol and prayed over

her. I took off her clothes and she sat around in her diaper. (We had company…she’ ll be embarrassed someday.

:))

I heard back from my friend and figured that I was doing what I could for now.

Hopefully she’d be better in the morning.

I packed her into her carseat (she sleeps there sometimes) and spent a very fitful night on the couch with her next to me.

She didn’t sleep more than a couple hours at a time, so neither did I.

Poor girl.

But what gets me about the whole thing is that I knew she was feeling awful.

All I had to do is look at her eyes and I could tell she was just not herself.

She was more clingy and cuddly and just wanted to be held, but she wasn’t super whiny or crying…in fact, she was pretty happy (and even laughing!) for having the temperature she did.

I love my girl…and what she teaches me without even trying.

That even on the bad days it’s ok to smile. That we can feel awful and still be a blessing to others around us. That laughter can sometimes truly be the best medicine.

We got the prescription filled yesterday (Thank you, Target Pharmacy, for being open on Sundays.) and gave her a dose of amoxicillin. Which she happily slurped up…and thank you, God, for giving me a girl who will take her medicine. :)

She’s still not quite back to normal…it will probably be another day or so…but she still took some time to laugh with her daddy yesterday afternoon and snuggle with me. And we even got out of the house for a bit today with a friend, and she did great!

Tobin took a few pictures of her this past week that are

too cute not to share. Enjoy them. :)

Love her!

Sig

Filed Under: being mommy, blessings, Maelie

A Powerful Mommy Moment

February 6, 2011 by · 58 Comments

I’m not even sure I know how to write about this.

It took

me over a week just to put the feeling into words.

But I’ll try.

One of the hardest things my husband and I have gone through in our married life was in 2009 when our plan to adopt fell through. I blogged a little about it here and here.

At that time, I almost completely lost the ability to write…hence the reason there are really only two posts about the subject.

However, one thing I found solace in was music…it was like an escape for my soul. Whether drowning out the world with my iPod and headphones or belting out a tune while strumming my guitar, it helped me survive when life felt like it would never be ok again. And one Friday afternoon in my classroom, the words to a song just came to me. The chorus? Came in like ten seconds.

The verses took about an hour. The bridge…I’ m still waiting on.

Sometimes in the mornings, Maelie will play on the floor and I’ll pull out my guitar and sing to her. Last Friday, in an attempt to get her to spend more time on her tummy, I decided it was a good day for some music. I strummed through a few familiar songs and then played the one I wrote two years ago…a song I really hadn’t touched since then. I’m used to her cooing or bopping to the music, but when I started singing that one, she stopped and stared at me intently, almost as if she understood what I was singing about.

And then I realized, Now I get it, too.

It was a moment that brought tears…but so many reasons to smile, too.

I am so very thankful for my daughter…not just for her but for what I’ve learned through her. That my Father is so amazingly Good. That there is healing after loss.

That it is possible to love even through sadness.

I am just so filled with overwhelming gratitude to God for my sweet girl.

Maelie Naomi, I love you so much.

Thank you, Father, for broken dreams that turn into something more beautiful than I ever could have imagined. Thank you for holding my hand through it all. Thank you for seeing when I couldn’t.

There I Am

It wasn’t what she’d dreamed,
She’d always had a plan.


It wasn’t what she wanted,
And she didn’t understand.
Every night she prayed
For a way to make it through.
In the sleepless nights she heard His voice,
“I will carry you…

Chorus

I was there, and I still Am.
I am right beside you holding your hand.


Though you can’t see,
Trust that I can.


No matter where you go,
There I Am.”

Disclaimer: So I did attempt to record this (it’s only part of the song), but my computer’s not the greatest for this kind of thing.

And I don’t really write songs. And I desperately needed to change one of my guitar strings.

And… I was really freaked out about posting myself singing on this blog.

So a little mercy, please. :) And…ok, just listen to it.

 

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Sig

Filed Under: adoption, being mommy, Maelie, music, remembering, what I'm learning

The Words I Would Say

February 3, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

I had the most precious cuddle time with my girl this morning.

Th at is

a very rare thing.

I don’t mean that she isn’t sweet or huggable…just that she’s never really been a cuddler. (With me, anyway… she does cuddle with Aunt Kris once in awhile.

:))

We’ve been waiting for her top two middle teeth to come through for the past couple weeks…and we are still waiting. And while we wait, she is cranky and doesn’t feel well. But this morning she decided that instead of being fussy, she would cuddle up close, which was an amazing surprise, and I loved it.

I just sat on the couch and held her, and it was probably the best part of my day.

And while I was holding her, I was thinking about parenting and all that we’ve learned since Mae was born in June.

Like how little sleep we can actually survive on.

Or that she consumes the majority of our time…and that’s ok. And that time for just the two of us is precious because it doesn’ t happen of

ten.

And that having a daughter is the best thing that’s ever happened to us.

I heard the song “The Words I Would Say” by Sidewalk Prophets awhile ago, and it immediately connected w

ith my heart.

Not all of it applies, but the chorus especially made me think of Maelie and the things that I want her to know about life…well, as soon as she’s old enough to understand. :)

This is such a great song…and I found several different versions on Youtube if you like free. But it’s definitely worth your m oney

on iTunes, too.

:)

The Words I Would Say

Three in the morning,
And I’m still awake,
So I picked up a pen and a page,
And I started writing,
Just what I’d say,
If we were face to face,
I’d tell you just what you mean to me,
I’d tell you these simple truths,

Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You’re going to do great things,
I already know,
God’s got His hand on you so,
Don’t live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don’t forget why you’re here,
Take your time and pray,
These are the words I would say,

Last time we spoke,
You said you were hurting,
And I felt your pain in my heart,
I want to tell you,
That I keep on praying,
Love will find you where you are,
I know cause I’ve already been there,
So please hear these simple truths,

Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You’re going to do great things,
I already know,
God’s got His hand on you so,
Don’t live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don’t forget why you’re here,
Take your time and pray,
These are the words I would say,

From one simple life to another,
I will say,
Come find peace in the Father,

Be strong in the Lord and,
Never give up hope,
You’re going to do great things,
I already know,
God’s got His hand on you so,
Don’t live life in fear,
Forgive and forget,
But don’t forget why you’re here,
Take your time and pray,
Thank God for each day,
His love will find a way,
These are the words I would say.

Sig

Filed Under: being mommy, Maelie, music
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